I Am Entitled, and you are? 6:2

MIND-


I am choosing to discuss Narcissistic Personality Disorder because I have dealt with this issue in my own life over the years. I grew up with a narcissistic father. I can remember my father getting extremely upset after my litte sister was born. He was so jealous and angry that nobody was paying him any attention. I can remember the day she came home from the hospital, he made a scene, threw something down and said "nobody cares about me."  My mother was co-dependent and catered to his every whim. They have since divorced, however he has stuck to his word and has continued to date co-dependent women that he treats badly. They always say that you end up marrying a man like your father, and in my case this was also true. After a failed marriage, I find myself always dating the same type of men (narcissists.) This has been a tremendous learning experience for me. In dealing with people who have this disorder, I have gained a deep introspection into my own psyche, but also into the minds of future patients.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a disorder in which the individual (50-75% male) has an inflated sense of entitlement and self-importance, need for admiration and compliments, extreme self-involvement, and lack of empathy for others. Individuals with this disorder are usually arrogant, self-assured, confident and expect to be acknowledged as superior in all environments, to include, work and relationships. A person with narcissistic personality disorder:

• Reacts to criticism with rage, shame, or humiliation
• Become defensive when their self-esteem is threatened
• Sometimes lead dangerous lifestyles (impulsivity, sensation-seeking)
• Takes advantage of other people to achieve his or her own goals
• Has feelings of self-importance
• Exaggerates achievements and talents
• Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love
• Has unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment
• Requires constant attention and admiration
• Disregards the feelings of others, lacks empathy
• Has obsessive self-interest
• Pursues mainly selfish goals
• Is easily jealous

Many Narcissists are intelligent, charasmatic, attractive and witty. They use these features to their advantage when first meeting people. They tend to be wonderful liars and see nothing wrong with lying to get what they want (manipulation.) I watched a man break down in tears over the death of his father in order to get out of going somewhere. It was, of course, a complete lie. Many of these individuals lead double lives and create an alternative life they wish they could live. They also create lies in their head, until they start to believe the fantasies. It's only after truth is revealed and their lives come crashing down, that they begin to face reality.

There are some highly successful individuals that are considered narcissistic, however the disorder is only diagnosed after their behaviors become persistent, disabling or distressing. Due to the individual's extreme sensitivity to criticism or judgement they may suffer from social withdrawal, depression, and an inability to perform in areas of competition, due to fear of defeat. Narcissists are at a higher risk of suffering from substance and alcohol abuse and may also have other personality disorders such as Histrionic, Borderline, Antisocial, and Paranoid. Many also have difficulties with long-term relationships. Only 1% of the population is said to be afflicted with this disorder and the prevelance drops considerably after age 30.

Causes of Narcissism are not yet understood. Some researchers believe it could be related to genetics, environment, (watching and learned behavior) or a natural reaction to societies treatment toward someone who is attractive and intelligent. Treatment for Narcissists is dismal because they avoid therapy and are closed off to being analyzed and judged. 

Interesting Article